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| Thoughts, Opinions, and Ideas on the Beloved Chicago Bears! | |||||
Entry for August 28, 2007  Once again we sit here on the eve of the start of the 2007 campaign to Drive to the Desert! And once again, the feeling of uncertainity overwhelms me. For the love of all things good, is it really that difficult to receive a snap from the center? Isn't that something learned while in Pop Warner football? And have the Bears taken a page from the Cubs on their practice of misleading the public and their fans on the subject of injury? Don't have the head coach trot out and tell us Tommie Harris will be playing last Saturday, only to spend the game on the sidelines. Lastly, what is it with athletes today? Why is it so hard to assume a level of responsibility towards their careers and their jobs. While most of us bite, scratch, and claw day to day to make a living, I find it sickening that a certain All-Pro linebacker who not less than 2 months ago was complaining about securing a contract to support himself and family finds it necessary to be out at several clubs at 3AM on a Monday morning? What good can happen at a club on a Monday night? So while most Bears fans are puffing their chests out for this upcoming season, I look at uncertainity at a QB who has yet to show he can play consistently, a RB who has yet to stay healthy for an entire season, a Defensive Line that was average at best without Tommie Harris, and a team that is no more than 2-3 injuries away from looking up from the bottom.
2007-08-29 01:48:40 GMTComments: 0 |Permanent Link
12/30/06 - Thoughts & Memoirs of Sexy Rex Grossman
Is that Berrian? I think he's triple-covered. You know what? Fuck it. I'm throwing it downfield. 2006-12-31 00:35:35 GMTComments: 0 |Permanent Link
12/13/06 - Gus Griese Speaks
Gus Grossman here again. I know I usually put in my two cents every other week or so, but after Sunday's game, I couldn't wait any longer to weigh in on the QB problem in Chicago. What can I say? I am disgusted, embarrassed, ashamed, shocked and disappointed in my brother. I have run out of excuses for him and I can no longer defend him. He is a big boy and I am tired of having his back. In fact, I am so upset with Rex and his play, I am not only clamoring for Brian Griese to play, I am so embarrassed by Rex that I am actually changing my name to Gus Griese. That is how much I want my new brother in the game, as he is a brother I can be proud of. So until further notice, it's Gus Griese. I want to break down Greise a little bit and analyze him so that I can show all of the idiots who still support Rex why it is obvious that Griese is the man.....Lovie, I hope you are reading this too. With Rex you get INTs, with Griese, we will get ball control, smart decisions, good throws and our turnovers will be erased. Of course you cannot go by what Griese has actually done in the past, cause that's in the past. So forget his career 78 INTs to 88 TDs. You have to ignore his 7 INTs in 6 games in 2005. His 15 INTs in 13 games in 2002. His 6 INTs in 5 games in 2003 and his 12 INTs in 13, because like I said that was the old Brian Griese. The Bears got the new Brian Griese. The guy who is an awesome QB who never throws INTs. Not only that, the Bears really could use Griese's deep playoff experience. Granted, he has never taken a team to the playoffs, but he played for the Denver Broncos after they won two Super Bowls, so he has played for a team that was great in the playoffs, and that probably rubbed off on him. Oh, and I know what you are thinking Grossman lovers....How come Griese is on his 4th team in 5 seasons if he is soooo good, and how come Mike Shannahan kicked him to the curb if he is so good? But that's just the thing. Griese was too good for Shannahan. Mike Shannahan prides himself on developing QBs who are bad, so that he can turn them into good QBs and look like a genius. With Griese, he was already great, and there was nothing Shannahan could do to improve him. So, the ego maniac that Shannahan is, he ran Griese out of town so that he could try to turn a new bad QB into a good one and restore his reputation. Miami is a cheap team and they knew if they kept Griese around longer than one year they were going to have to pay him all this money, because he was the best QB in the league, so to avoid having to pay him, they just dumped him. Pretty classless move on their part. This brought Brian to Tampa, where he was injured and eventually let go in favor of Chris Simms. What people don't know is that Simms' Dad paid Gruden to let Griese go because old Phil knew that his boy would never have a chance of being a starter if he was forced to compete with Griese. This brings Brian to his current situation with the Bears. Griese showed in the preseason that if given a chance to play he is truly an MVP caliber player. Brian dominated San Fran, Arizona, Cleveland and San Diego's second and third string defenses. What more do you need to see? Clearly Lovie doesn't have a clue. Griese has never been given a fair shake in this league, whether it was because of Shannahan's super ego, Miami's cheapness, or Phil Simms' bribes.....the Bears need to give Griese a chance. We need his ball control skills and most importantly his playoff and super bowl experience. 2006-12-14 00:38:27 GMTComments: 0 |Permanent Link
12/1/06 - Return of Gus Grossman
Hey Bear fans, old Gus is back and he brings with him some very important insider information, that only the kin of a Chicago Bear could bring you. A lot of people have been asking me over the past couple weeks, "What's wrong with your brother?" "Why is Rex so inconsistent?" "Why does Rex keep turning the ball over?" Well, I am here to answer those questions. The truth is, Rex hasn't suited up since the Giants game. Coach Smith and Jerry Angelo decided that the only way the Bears are going to win the Super Bowl is if they have Rex healthy, and so they did not want to take any chances with him for the last month of the season. And because Brian Griese may be needed in the playoffs if Rex gets hurt, the Bears decided they couldn't risk him either, so they chose to play Kyle Orton instead. So, starting with the Jets game, Kyle Orton with a fresh hair cut and shave, started wearing Rex's uniform during the games and was the starting QB. The Bears employed a homeless man to dress up as Kyle Orton on the sidelines so that no one suspected anything. The Bears great scheme ran into some trouble after the Jets game, however. The Bears offensive game plan was obviously geared toward Kyle Orton and not Rex Grossman, as the Bears barely passed the football and let Thomas Jones run 8 straight plays, resulting in a FG to open the second half. When writers and radio hosts kept referring to the Jets game as a "Kyle Orton game plan" game, Lovie and Jerry got nervous. Was everyone on to their little trick? Was Kyle's cover blown? So, to prevent risking their plan from being uncovered, the Bears switched back to the regular game plan, as though the real Grossman was playing against he Patriots. Unfortunately, the real Grossman wasn't playing and Kyle threw 3 INTs and pretty much lost the game. I heard that Lovie is mad at Jerry for convincing him to do this and so the real Rex will be back under center this week against Minnesota. Although, Rex better watch his back, as apparently Darren Sharper is upset with Rex for talking to his teammate using naughty words. The worst words Darren has ever heard, he said. Well, Darren better take off his skirt cause Olin is angry at him now and I am not sure about Darren, but I would rather have Rex tell me I suck, than have an angry Olin Kreutz looking for me downfield. I am looking for a complete Bears ass whooping this Sunday; 31-9. Darren should also bring a bar of soap on the field so that he can clean out Rex's potty mouth, cause after Rex bounces back from his two week layoff with 3 TD passes, he is going to be cursing up a storm. Go Bears, Go Rex, Gus 2006-12-04 13:32:31 GMTComments: 0 |Permanent Link
10/28/06 - Gus Grossman Does it Again!
Hey Bear Fans, Well, it has been a long-interesting bye week for your friend Gus. On October 20th I officially moved out of Rex's basement....while that may seem like good news that someone of my age is no longer living in the basement of his younger brother's home, it's not all that great of news, as the reason being is that Rex is kind of pissed at me. I am now living in Lyle Orton's RV that is parked next to Kyle Orton's doublewide in Gurnee, doublewide-more like quadruple-wide. Kyle's pad is totally pimp. He has a kegerator set up with ice cold Milwaukee's Best, kick ass black light posters, lava lamps and the dude always has Funyons in his cupboard. Plus, I don't have to worry about blowing smoke out of my window and hiding my weed, like I did at Rex's place. Like I said, Rex is kind of upset with Gus and one could say that Rex kicked me out, and in all fairness I probably deserved it. I think he could tolerate the pornography charges, the occasional drunken "mess," the smell I give off, etc...but I think I crossed the line with my behavior last week. Let me preface this by saying that I am the biggest Rex fan in the world, I think he is great, but I am still the dude's older brother and I don't care how good and famous you are, the older brother is still the king of the family. All week last week I made it a point to remind Rex of his dreadful Monday night game, you know, just cause I can, and plus, I haven't had too many chances in life to kick Rex while he was down and I guess I just kind of let it get out of hand. It's not like it was anything too bad, just things like, at dinner when Alison asks for the salt and Rex goes to hand it to her I lunged out of my seat, snatched the salt and took off down the hallway yelling, "Grossman throws his first pick of the night and Sexy Gusy takes it to the house!" Or as Rex is taking a bite of his food I swatted his fork to the ground and screamed, "Fumble!!! recovered by Gus Grossman and Rex now has his second turnover in 3 minutes." What really pushed him over the line was when I snuck up behind him in the bathroom while he was taking a leak and quickly shoved him, causing him to piss all over the floor and I provide the commentary of, "Grossman's inaccuracy has plagued him all day, I mean, he just can't hit anything tonight." Or when I shoved my finger up his nose and said, "And Grossman is picked again, unreal." There was more stuff, too, but I think you all get the idea. So I just wanted to take this chance to apologize to Rex, wish him well against the 49ers and to also ask him if he could possibly call Verizon and have my cellphone service turned back on. I know you pay for it and all, but I would really appreciate it, and I promise I will stop with the prank calls and I will stop hanging up on you while pretending your cell signal went out, only so that I can call you back to ask why you fumbled the call. Go Bears...GO SEXY REXY!!!!!!!!!!!! Let's make it 7-0. Gus 2006-10-31 02:01:29 GMTComments: 0 |Permanent Link
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